Ways of being

Finally remember during journey back from school to tell Jamie he’s got a doctor’s appointment next week.

Jamie:    Okay.  Pause.  Out of interest, why?

Me:         Asperger’s meeting

Jamie:    Or as Dan would say, retard testing

Me:         Noooo!

We then proceed to have our standard conversation about the merits of being different, the importance of being yourself and the fun of eccentricity.  All going fine and I think I’m selling the Being Special line well, until Daniel butts in.

Daniel:    Except you’re not.  So good one, Mum, make him feel worse

Luckily for Daniel a) I’m driving and can’t reach to throttle him and b) Jamie thinks this is hilarious. 

I’d like to think Dan’s secretly a bit jealous that I don’t link him in conversation with other Asperger hopefuls such as Mozart, Einstein or Bill Gates.  Except he’s really into his social life at the moment, and I know he doesn’t care.

More importantly, Jamie’s not bothered and for him it just means that he needs to learn the rules of social interaction that other people seem to know innately.  The thing he’s minded most has been humour, but even that has rules and he's starting to get them.  Now he understands how to make people laugh, he's so chuffed and it's all the funnier because we're not expecting it.

As for me, your child’s your child and you wouldn’t have them any other way.  Jamie has this naivety and innocence which makes me look at the world afresh and even the dull things become special.  He’s the kindest child I’ve ever known and as he put it when he was eight:

“I know I’m weird, but I’m still a very good friend”.